Sensitivity.

I'm learning some new things about myself. I can be extremely sensitive to things happening in the world around me. Sometimes I struggle with knowing what's right and what's wrong, and it causes me to be completely fixated on certain issues more than others.

I desperately want to do what's right, and live in a way that is honourable and God pleasing....however, I fail so often, and struggle with knowing where the line is.

My boyfriend reminded me today that we need to be living in a way that honours God and not worry so much about what other people are doing with their lives, but examine how we as individuals are living our lives. Are the things that I do, and the things that I say, honouring to God? Am I watching movies that are uplifting, or ones that cause me to stumble. Are the songs on my ipod saturated with good lyrics?... Or are they degrading and causing me to think sinful thoughts? I need to stop looking at what other people are doing, and start seeing the areas of my life that I need to work on.... speaking of which I think I'm going to get rid of some songs on my Itunes library....

Examine your heart and the things you fill your life with. Always set goals and challenges for yourself at every point in your life...see how you can GROW! :)

Ponder.

Spread Joy.

JOY is the character trait I strive for the most in my life. JOY and Jesus are the same in my mind....and I want to spread that joy to everyone I meet!! :) AHHHHH, life, here we come!! :)

Be awesome instead.

Lately, I have felt like my thoughts have been under attack. My body aches because I can't sleep, eat, or even think because of unnecessary stress and worry. This morning when I woke up at 7, I felt so worn down from stress, that I barely made it to my 8oclock class. Being consumed by stress is probably one of the worst feelings I've ever experienced. AHH.

I'm saying all of this in order to fully explain the 180 degree change in my attitude that happened halfway through work at Williams today.

Like people say: there's always a silver lining to every grey cloud.

It all started while I was at work, and this beautiful little girl with down syndrome reached up her arms to the counter and looked at me with the sweetest little smile on her face. I almost cried. There is something so innocent and loving in the eyes of a child. My heart melted just from her look of wanting me to hold her; being wanted by another human being is truly beautiful.

Deciding to change my attitude, I intentionally strived to focus on other people for the rest of my shift and and not myself. It is SOOOO freeing when we take the focus off of ourselves and intentionally seek to make someone else's day. Taking a look at myself and doing some self-reflection, I've realized that lately, I have not been the person I want to be. Stress and inner anxiety makes me less of the person that God created me to be, and I will NOT let the enemy win that inner battle.

Today, and tomorrow, I will not be sad, but will be awesome instead. Awesome because of Jesus' overwhelming JOY which He has given to me once again. :)